Tuesday, February 20, 2007

My Plate Is Full, And I'm Not Hungry

I think I'm crazy. Seriously. I don't have any reason to feel overwhelmed, or stressed, or tired, or anything. I just got back from a fantastic vacation for goodness sake! But, I do. I feel like my life is so packed up...and I have to juggle things like, school, my friends, my job, and my own personal time to be alone with myself and with God.

Everday this week I have something planned/scheduled. And it's funny because I know there has been times in my life when I had nothing to do ever and I was so bored and I'd get so frustrated because I just wanted to have something to do! And now I do and I just want to curl up into a ball on my bed and hide and wait for all of it to go away. But then again, at the same time I'm so pumped that I have the friends I have, and I want to see them/spend time with them always! I think I need help. Hah.

I feel so weak though, I think what I really need is just time to focus and reflect for myself. I think I should give up staying on the computer so late, I should try and motivate myself to do the things I know I have to do such as, I should get all my serious work done before I go out and play, and I should spend more time alone with God.

I'm in need of prayer my friends. I wish I didn't feel so much like I am complaining, but I'm so emotionally exhausted. But I know there are people out there that definitely have it SO much worse. Like, look at me. I'm complaining because I have "too much to do" Pfft! I feel so guilty for complaining about something like this.

Why am I so messed up? God, I really need you. Help.

Until next time, God Bless.

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